Last week, the dreaded phone call came.
I’m not talking about the bailiff requesting his money. Not, it’s much worse.
The family call.
Everything was rolling along nicely, we talked about the weather (bad), our health (worse than bad) and the dogs (crazy and happy), when suddenly there was pause. My heart stopped. My hand shook. My blood ran cold as I heard the words I wish they had never whispered.
“What do you want for Christmas?”
You might wonder why I reacted this way to a simple and quite nice question. First of all, Santa and I aren’t good friends since he ate all the cookies when I was 5. Secondly, it reminds me I need to go gifts shopping too.
If I were elected president (don’t laugh, anyone can do it. Remember who’s the next head of America? If he did it, so can I.) I would forbid the exchange of presents during the holiday season and make compulsory the eat-all-you-can challenges. Because let’s be honest, the food is the best part of Christmas.
Anyway, while my brain was frantically looking for an answer that would satisfy the other end of the call, my blogging brain cells (yes, they’re separated from the others) informed me I’d better go and write a list on the blog in case my Santas’ English is good enough to decipher it *evil laughter*
#1 A Book.
Obviously. But don’t be fooled, oh reader, for I do no wish for a book picked from the bookstore recommendations display. I want a book from my favorite genre. A book I have been talking about. A book I showed you 10 times on the laptop’s screen, hoping to get your attention long enough for your mind to get the hint.
How dare you asking me why? It’s WINTER here! I’m cold. That is why I need socks. Preferably not the boring white or black ones they sell in bulks. Homemade woolen socks! Or if you can’t knit, cute and fluffy Harry Potter socks. Cat socks. Bookish socks. Socks I can proudly wear and take photographs of to add to my Instagram account.
Available here. I can’t resist those socks. Chocolate to keep my feet warm!!
Recommend me something. Blow my mind.
#4 More media space on WordPress.
#5 The “Cant read without my lipstick” OPI nailpolish.
Because there’s “read” in the name. Yes, I’m that superficial. Also, the color looks great (Bookstagram pics again!)
#6 Vouchers for more books.
That TBR won’t grow by itself (although sometimes it does feel like it)
#7 Mugs and cups.
One can never have enough tea cups. How do you play “how many cups of tea can you drink in a day” with your friends if you don’t have cups? Mugs are for solitary pleasures: nice evenings with a fantasy book, a Friday night date with a romance, an unplanned lunch with a thriller.
#8 Fluffy cushions and a warm blanket.
Don’t deny your grandma side, you know you want to cuddle with a book comfortably settled in an armchair or a couch with your favorite cushions and a soft blanket. Preferably long so that the feet don’t stick out.
Because I’m obsessed with them but I only own one at the moment…
#10 A New Book Boyfriend.
Come on, don’t be shy, grab that copy with a half-naked guy on the cover and wrap him up with Christmas paper. I won’t be mad, I promise.
#11 A New pair Of Eyes.
Because my glasses are killing me, they’re hiding my beautiful eyes, and I can read longer with eyes that don’t act like they’re 70 and ready to give up on life.
#12 An AMAZON gift card.
Because the 231 books on there won’t magically appear on my Kindle!
I’m a softie, and I’m broke, so I figured it would seem less awkward if I said I wanted hugs as that’s probably what you’ll get from me. With all my love.
#14 A Sick Day.
A “My child can’t go to work today because he’s sick” note so I can skimp work for a full day when a book needs my undivided attention.
Make it two notes!
Because chocolates help with book hangovers and you never know when you’ll need it. (Did you really believe I would not mention food in my list? Do you know me??)
Even if I keep losing them, they’re totally needed to every book lover who can never remember what page they stopped at.
The truth is gifts are not what I expect from December. I live far away from my family so I don’t care for what they bring as long as there’s cheddar on the table, the heating on, and a table full of happy faces. The presents question makes me uncomfortable because forcing people to give gifts on specific day is plain weird. But I am lucky to have a family who cares and tries their best to please each other. I did this fun list thinking of them and what they do and don’t expect a book lover to ask for.
What’s on your letter for Santa? What’s the worst gift you ever received? Let’s share the forced shopping dreams and nightmares!
This was a pre-Christmas anxiety post. My apologies for the inconvenience. If you read it entirely, you are a true friend.